Dad's Birthday

Dad throughout the years. The earliest photo is of him and his father, Lester Starling.

Today is dad's birthday, 01.06.10. He's 65 years old. He has successfully made it through all the important holidays.

Time is ticking by fast, faster than it usually does and dad is always a day or two ahead, he's lost track of time. I stayed over last night because mom has to go to the nursing home first thing in the morning to take care of hospice for grandma. She needed me to help get dad started on his day. I'm not sure what that entails, but I've got a good idea. We had a good evening, not sure if he did. He tries to curl up in a fetal position when he's in pain, but he has a hard time doing that because of his ileostomy bag. He stayed in that position, the best he could, all evening and through the night. We watched a John Wayne movie that was made in 1930. Dad loves westerns, I don't... I'm watching a lot of westerns...

It's 7:00 am now and I've been up since 5:30 am. I set up my coffee maker in the office and had it all ready to go so I wouldn't disturb anyone. Since dad has such a keen sense of smell these days I had to put a towel against the bottom of the door to prevent the aroma of coffee from getting to him. Hope it worked... It felt really weird sleeping in the house that I grew up in. I felt a magnetic pull to go home all night last night, and didn't sleep well because of it.

Last night before I went to bed, I emptied out dads ileostomy bag and made sure he didn't need me anymore. He told me that he was with his mom 65 years ago today, but he can't remember it. I was puzzled as to what he meant, and a little concerned that he might be losing his memory or slipping out of his mind... What he was telling me was that he was born 65 years ago. He said he was born around 2 a.m and it was the coldest night that they had had in years. It was frigid early this a.m so it was much like the early morning he was born. I told him I'd wish him happy birthday in the morning, since technically he wasn't born yet. He responded with "I was still present, even though I wasn't born." That makes sense, he was here, just waiting to escape the womb...

Dad has problems with swallowing and his mouth stays dry all the time. He has these cu tip type sponges that he keeps wet and in his mouth, so he doesn't say much anymore because of that. It's hard to guage what he's feeling, but he is in a little more pain now than before. He was a grumpy fellow yesterday, so I kept quiet around him. Dad gets irritated easily and he still has the ability to raise his weak voice to scolding level...